Here and There

Upon Winter

2006-11-20T19:42:00.000-08:00

Fall is over and we are coming upon winter. The island is so incredibly beautiful here in the fall season. The leaves turned all sorts of colors and towards the end the leaves were all bright yellow. Now the trees are mostly bare and it's almost time for the Thanksgiving holiday. There are many things I wish I could make last so much longer. Recording and writing isn't going as well as I had hoped. I planned to be writing and recording nonstop once I got here and it's just not coming. I put so many expectations on myself which was my first mistake. I'm realizing that I have a lot more to deal with inside of myself than I thought. I guess you learn a lot when you are stuck with yourself on an island for a couple months. I'm seeking outside and searching inside of myself trying to find what it might be that makes me feel the way I do....insecure, unconfident...blah, blah, blah. I just want to figure it out so I can make it go away. I know it doesn't work that way necessarily but I am a firm believer in soul searching...digging deep into the past to see what might have made me the way I am now or looking to the future to see who it is I want to become. I just want to be aware, aware of who I am and why...and aware of others around me...it's just not easy or all that fun sometimes. So I'm on a journey just like everyone is, whether they believe it or not, and I'm working towards something that's bigger than myself or anyone else. At this point I don't feel like I have much to offer...I'm not recording much and having a pretty hard time writing...so I'm reading a lot and I think it's good for me. I'm reading novels or books of poetry. Things are always changing and because of that we are never stuck in the same spot for too long...there's hope in that, right?

Martha's Vineyard

2006-10-05T21:16:00.000-07:00

I've been here on the island for over a month now. It hardly seems real. It seems like yesterday I was arriving on the island with my dad for the second time...being reminded of all the beautiful familiar places yet so many unfamiliar faces and now...I've been here for over a month and this place is becoming my home once again. If there is one thing I always catch myself thinking about it is the concept of time...time fascinates me and time scares me to death. Life is made of this collage of moments...good and bad...and these moments are made of seconds and minutes and hours and it all passes by so quickly. And although I'm only 22 it seems that the older I get the faster time goes by and I find myself trying to reach out and grab hold of all that I am experiencing and all that is going on in my life at that very moment so that I can keep it close to me and breathe it all in before it goes away. How do we make things last? How do we take in all that is going on around us...the beauty, the events we want to remember and those we want to forget? These are the things I've been thinking about while I've been on the island. I’m supposed to be here until Christmas and I have no idea what I will be doing after that. At this point I feel like my feet are just above the ground and I'm floating around from one moment to the next never really knowing where I'll be going, who I'll be meeting or what I'll be doing. Life is so weird. While I am here I am working on writing and recording music...like most things, I'm not quite sure what will come of it but I love it and it's what I have to offer. I think music is one way I can love and communicate with others effectively and I think we should always be trying to find ways to do that. Until next time...

(that was for you johnny:)

The Dylan Concert...

2006-09-02T18:12:00.000-07:00

I saw a legend last night. In addition to the amazing music, I loved seeing all of the different types of people. There were young kids, high school and college students, parents, senior citizens…there were hippies, businesspeople, punk rockers, grungy people. So many different people inspired and affected by one man, one musician. It’s incredible. My dad and I had early admission tickets so we got to go in before the general public and scurried our way to the front of the stage. The front of the stage wasn’t crowded right away but throughout the three opening acts more and more people began to pour in. First with Alana James, then Junior Brown, then Jimmy Vaughn and finally the man himself. I have never smelled so many different smells in the same vicinity before…cigarette smoke, cigar smoke, marijuana smoke, beer, B.O., bad breath, mothballs, greasy food…somehow all blended together…it was amazing. By the time Dylan got on stage the air was filled with smoke and everyone’s bodies were beginning to mold together…strangers seemingly became the best of friends. It’s so funny how when you are standing next to someone for six hours at a concert while screaming and pumping your fists together you feel like you know them so much better by the time it’s over…even if you didn’t say one word to each other. There is even some feelings of sorrow when it’s time to part. It’s like some subconscious bond you’ve created or something. Some other memories I have from the concert are as follows: people pushing there way to the front, blankets being stepped on, drinks being spilled, strangers talking to one another, middle-aged woman dancing and flailing their arms to and fro, young lovers making out, old couples making out, 65 year old women with gray hair hanging down to the back of their thighs who never quite grew out of their hippie stage and…tie-dye. Do you know what’s even better than tie-dye…a tie-dye shirt with Bob Dylan’s face on it…doesn’t get much better than that. Out of all those things and all of those memories do you know what my favorite part of the whole concert was? It was when my dad left for about a half hour and later came back with a half cup of coffee and half of his chocolate cookie he had saved for me after stopping by the concession stand. Love is what always seems to be remembered most and although I love Bob Dylan...I'm pretty sure my dad loves me more. And knowing that is better than seeing Bob Dylan in concert.

2006-09-01T08:55:00.000-07:00

I am new at this whole post thing so we'll see how it works out for me. Let's do a little update: I just graduated college. I did some touring this summer with the JRB. I took a road trip with some friends to the west coast. I hung out a little in my hometown (Racine, WI) with the folks and friends. And now I am currently sitting at a Panera (free wireless:) with my dad somewhere in Pennsylvania. My dad and I will eventually be on our way to Martha's Vineyard where I will spend another semester working on music. As of tonight we will be spending our evening in Wappinger Falls, NY...I don't know where that is...no one really knows where that is but that's not the important thing. The important thing is that in Wappinger Falls, NY tonight...6:30pm specifally there will be a Bob Dylan concert with him promoting his new album "Modern Times" and my dad and I will be there. I am so excited and hopefully I'll post afterwards about it. So much going on in my heart and mind as of lately. This is yet another scary and unknown stage of my life I am entering into: post college life. I am excited and scared to death. I'll elaborate later but let's just say I am honored and ever so glad to be able to start this stage of my life...this journey...with Dylan. I am apprehensive yet hopeful. Till next time...PEACE friends.

-Linz